Overall, the first report card of a new school year is to be taken with a fairly large grain of salt.

For many schools and districts, we’re coming up on the end of the first grading period of the school year. Many students will come home with perfectly acceptable grades. Some will have their parents confused in one way or another. Here’s what to look for in that first report card.

Conduct

For the most part, don’t worry too much about actual grades (more about that later). What you might want to pay more attention to is conduct. Obviously, if conduct is bad, then learning suffers later.

If you are at all surprised about any conduct reports, reach out to the teacher immediately. Lots of things, including mindset, can change over the course of a summer. It’s better to get a handle on those changes now.

Grades

As said before, don’t pay as much attention to grades. It’s the first grading period. Summer brain drain, new surroundings, and new relationships can all make for a steep learning curve this early in the year. There are a few exceptions:

• For high school seniors, a lackluster report card now can signal the start of the “senior slide” and can have effects on the future that the student doesn’t understand. Their college of choice will still see these grades on their transcript, even if they’ve been admitted early.

• Bad grades for subjects in which the student normally excels are worth a conversation. In math, it might just be another steep learning curve (there is a big difference between geometry and calculus, for example). Some outside help might be warranted. If it’s another subject, there might be something wrong that only the child or the teacher can uncover. These tend to be interpersonal or organizational issues that are easily solved if caught early.

• Slipping grades in the “easy” courses, like PE or electives, are also worth a conversation. There can be a lot of reasons for these as well, but they also count just as much on a GPA and deserve some attention.

• Obviously if any grades are really bad, some action on your part is needed.

Overall, the first report card of a new school year is to be taken with a fairly large grain of salt. Yes, there are potential warning signs of upcoming troubles. But for the most part, many students struggle with getting back into the routine of school.

Every teacher prefers a different method of communication, so make sure you know theirs.

The first parent conference of the year is always part getting-to-know-you session, part business meeting. Here are the things on which you should concentrate the discussion. If there was a specific reason for the conference, that obviously takes precedence.

“Have you seen anything that could keep [your child] from being successful in class?”

Everyone is there to help your child be successful in school, so there’s no reason to beat around the bush. The teacher’s response could be anything from the odd misbehavior to serious skill deficits that might require remediation. You might think you already know the answer, but parents of children of a certain age (middle school) might be very surprised with their child’s personality at school.

“What does this year’s curriculum look like?”

This should have been covered briefly at Back to School night, but now’s the time to go in depth. Curricula have changed a lot since you were in school, so don’t expect you know what is learned in your child’s grade. You can also discuss your child’s experience with learning certain topics and where the teacher might expect him or her to struggle.

“How can we help [your child] outside of class?”

Even with kids that are superstars, teachers will always have suggestions for how parents can help maintain that trajectory at home. Even if they don’t think your child needs help, they will make suggestions, viewing your willingness to help as a bonding activity.

“How can we help you?”

There is always something for parents to do inside and outside of class to help out the teacher. It might be volunteering to chaperone a field trip, serving as a guest reader, or donating supplies. If the teacher doesn’t offer anything, suggest something simple. A big help these days is offering to update the class’s social media regularly. That saves the teacher a lot of time.

“What’s the best way to stay in contact with you?”

This should have been covered during Back to School Night, but just in case. Every teacher prefers a different method of communication, so make sure you know theirs. And also nail the teacher down on how they will be reaching out to you. Communication is a two-way street.

Your involvement in homework shouldn’t be any more than setting them up with the right tools and letting them struggle on their own.

Perhaps the biggest educational struggle for a parent is helping your child with their homework in the right way. You don’t want to help too much; they won’t learn anything. You don’t want to ignore it; that sets a bad example. Here’s how to walk the line.

Show Interest

The biggest thing a parent can do to affect their child’s educational success is to just participate. This includes homework. Simply asking about it and what their assignments are about is more than half the battle.

Set Them Up for Success

It’s a very rare child that knows how to organize themselves. Kids need help in learning how to keep things organized and set up the right work environment.

First, eliminate distractions. If you let your child complete their homework in their room with the door closed, there is probably a lot more going on than just homework. Work goes much more efficiently in a common area.

Second, make homework part of a routine. It helps them remember their assignments and helps you keep track of what’s going on.

Facilitate the Process, Instead of Completing It

Your job is to “lead the horse to water”. Your involvement in homework shouldn’t be any more than setting them up with the right tools and letting them struggle on their own.

Before they start, ask if they understand what they are supposed to do. If they don’t, help them find other materials that can help them, such as online tutorials. Consume them together as a demonstration of team building.

If they get frustrated in the middle of an assignment, offer a break and a talk—but never any advice about the specific work.

At the end, feel free to check their work over and even alert them to problems or tasks that might be wrong, but stop short of suggesting ways to make the answer better that go beyond any background information they would have received in class, in their textbook, or online.

Work Together with the Teacher

The homework process becomes much more effective if the parent and teacher work together as a team. After all, homework is just supposed to be practice. If the parent better understands what is involved in that practice, the child will be much more likely to complete it successfully.

Regular communication and the ability to ask the teacher for clarification can be valuable tools to help the parent and teacher work together effectively.

Threatening isn’t bullying—it’s criminal behavior that is against the law in any situation.

Schools and districts take bullying a lot more seriously now than when we were in class, but unfortunately that doesn’t mean it has gone away. What has happened is there are now some actionable steps that will get results. If you find out your child is being bullied at school, here are the steps you should take.

• Support your child

It takes a lot of courage for them to come to you. Support their feelings about the incident and never suggest they could have done more or they should “toughen up”.

• Get as many details as possible

Reporting a bullying incident requires specifics. Names, dates, times, locations, and what was said/done are all needed. If there were witnesses, get their information as well.

• If a threat was made, contact the police

Threatening isn’t bullying—it’s criminal behavior that is against the law in any situation.

• Research the school’s anti-bullying policy

It might have been bad behavior, but the incident might not fit the definition of bullying.

• Cyberbullying

If the bullying is occurring online, make sure cyberbullying is covered in the school’s policy. It might not be. If not, most states now have legislation regarding online bullying. If that’s the case, the police need to be notified.

• Contact school personnel

Severity and regularity dictate who you talk to. One time, minor offense? The teacher is probably fine. Anything more than that, make an appointment with the principal.

• Relay the information calmly

No matter how angry you might be, you’ll be much more likely to be able to work with the school if you come off as rational.

• Work together to come up with a plan

There should be specific steps that everyone involved need to accomplish after the meeting is concluded. Write these down and confirm after the meeting. Everyone, especially the school personnel, need to be held accountable.

• Follow up

A lot of parents don’t ask for updates from their child. Give it about a week and ask what has happened. Also, if you haven’t heard from the school, now is the time to make sure they are doing their part.

• If bullying continues, move up the chain of command

Most districts have administration-level personnel that are responsible for anti-bullying steps. If yours doesn’t, the superintendent is the next step. Copy the principal on all correspondence.
If the district is ineffective, file charges with the police and the school board.

Back to School Night really is a great event to get everyone on the same page and help start the school year off right.

The start of the school year is sneaking up on us. Before you know it, Back to School Night will be popping up on our calendars. Here is a checklist to make sure you meet all of your goals for the event while not overstepping.

• Bring your child

Students spend more of their time in school than they do with you. Bringing them to BTS gives them an opportunity to show off their “other world”. Besides, it’s entertaining to watch them act shy in front of you and their friends.

• Collect information about the PTA/PTO and upcoming events

Yes, you’re on the email list and the Facebook group. It doesn’t hurt to take some hard copies of any relevant information, especially about upcoming events. Put them up on the refrigerator.

• Introduce yourself to the principal

You may never see the principal but for Back to School, but it can’t hurt to show you are engaged with the school community. You never know when you’ll need to call him or her for something important.

• Learn about this year’s curriculum

Curricula has changed a lot in the past few years, not to mention since we were in school. Take time to flip through the textbooks (if they’re still being used) and ask the teacher(s) content-based questions.

• Ask about technology

Also ask about any technology needs your child might have for the class. There might be special apps to download or websites they might need to join.

• Do not discuss your child in specifics

Introduce yourself nicely so the teacher(s) can put a face to the name, but don’t take up the time of the other parents by trying to talk about your child in specifics. If you want to talk specifically about your child, send an email or schedule a conference.

• Make sure to ask when conferences will be held (or how to schedule one)

Speaking of which, some schools have designated times of the year for mandatory conferences. Others rely on the parents to make appointments. Make sure you know how to take advantage of your first opportunity to talk “business” with your child’s teacher(s).

Back to School Night really is a great event to get everyone on the same page and help start the school year off right. Afterwards, everyone should be working toward the common goal of student success.